Domestic violence is not uncommon these days, and this is one problem that has wrecked the lives of many people. Identifying this issue is the first process to saving the life of the victim.
So, how can you tell whether your loved one is in an abusive relationship?
Usually, the victims of domestic violence will hide the fact that their spouse is abusing them.
Thus, it makes it difficult for us to find out whether our loved ones are in an abusive relationship or not.
If you desire to uncover out no matter what if your loved one is in an abusive relationship, you will have to look out for the signs of domestic violence.
It’s perhaps the best way to ascertain whether someone in your family is in an abusive relationship.
- Has he/she stopped going to social gatherings?
A significant sign that you can look out for to determine whether or not your loved one is suffering from domestic violence is to find out whether the victim has stopped going to social gatherings.
The spouse may suggest for them to cut all ties with his or her family members or close friends.
Usually, the abuser will try to control the life of the victim. This kind of control does not necessarily mean holding the victim physically.
Many abusers want to control their respective spouses psychologically.
Thus, if someone close to you starts to look or behave strangely or if he or she stops visiting you without any reason, then maybe this person is the victim of domestic violence.
- He depends on the spouse for everything
The abuser will want his or her spouse to depend on him or her for everything. The main aim of the abuser is usually to make the victim think that the victim can’t lead a good life without the abuser.
- She changes her behavior in the partners’ presence
Whenever you happen to be in the middle of a chat or discussion and the victim changes on spotting the partner, then, that is a sign.
Such changes are usually noticeable, especially if you know the victim too well. That automatic switch in behavior should alert you for danger.
- They are insulted by their partner in other peoples presence
One of the most obvious signs that your loved one is facing domestic violence is when they receive insult from their partner in the presence of other people.
Most times, these insults come in the form of jokes, but in the real sense, they are sensitive.
Such sorts of humor are disrespectful and disheartening, and can be pathetic and heartbreaking.
It will also immediately show in your loved ones face, if they did not protest.
- Your friend doubts her abilities
When your once confident friend starts judging or doubting her ability, then it is a clear indication that abuse has set in.
The doubt they exhibit will even affect their decision-making ability. That friend that can easily decide on a thing now finds it extremely difficult.
- Controlling their financial life
When her spouse is controlling the way your partner spends her money, then that is a sign.
Some instances can include the partner stopping her from working, limiting how she buys things for herself or her loved ones and so on.
In such cases, the person starts to live in isolation because of too much restriction.
- Her social media usage is changed
If your friend is a regular user of social media and the spouse makes a suspicious change, then, this can be a sign.
Remember, not all changes are suspecious. For instance, when a friend begins to remove some friends from her list, delete some of her pictures, posts less often and more.
Also, their partner might have access to their account as a way of monitoring their online activities.
Some partners might claim they have trust and are building such but doing so in excess is intruding in their partner’s privacy.
- You find bruises on the abused skin
There are different kinds of domestic violence, and physical abuse is one type of power.
If you see any bruise or wound on the face or body of the victim from time to time, then maybe this person is in an abusive relationship.
Try to talk to the victim and make him or she speak to you about his or her problems.
You might only be in a situation to support the victim once he or she admits that he or she is in an abusive relationship.
Precisely how do you help a friend suffering from domestic violence?
You should be sure that your loved one is suffering from domestic violence before you confront the abuser or take any legal actions against him or her.
Most of the victims will be reluctant to talk about it. However, if you feel that your loved one is in an abusive relationship, you should speak to him or her. With these tips, you can easily talk to them.
- Find a private setting and begin
The first thing that will make that very conversation fruitful is if you begin positively.
You could inform your buddy how substantially you miss them and then they can feel comfortable with you.
Make them feel safe with the warm smile you give. Afterwards, start by telling your concern.
As you do so, do not show any sign of panic. Instead, relax and prove your confidence.
As said earlier, this can be a difficult conversation for them but be patient. Most times, they may not want to talk about it.
- Listen up as they speak
If your loved one is willing to speak, support whatever they are saying. Just listen without complaining or judging a friend.
You should know that often; they might have lost the control of their lives. The abuser controls their lives. They might have lost their ability to choose what they want.
In that case, try and avoid advising them. Just listen because your advice at that point may not be fruitful
Let them know you trust and support their decisions. Keeping their decision will make them not have any regrets in the future.
- Encourage your friend
As said earlier, it is not a good idea to judge or criticize an abused person. It is also not right to make decisions for them.
The encouragement you can give them is to highlight the things you have noticed and tell how scared you feel about them in that situation.
You can, however, give them options on what you feel can help them. These options can include recommendations of some books or visiting a behavioral health center.
Your recommendation might be helpful because most times, they feel safe talking to someone they do not know at all.
- Be there for them
Even after rendering your excellent advice, your friend will still need your support. Do not forsake them at that moment.
Monitor their progress through your visits or calls. You also need to care for yourself by not getting too frustrated about your friend’s problems. This singular act adds up to your friends’ quick recovery.
Final words
Make the victim realize that he or she would be better off without the abuser. Once the victim tells you that he or she is indeed a sufferer of domestic violence, you can think of ways to help the victim.
Domestic violence can happen to anyone. However, this article will help you carver for your friends and loved ones involved in domestic violence.
